A window inside life at Augustana College

Augustana People: Sam Mago, the last scion of House Mago.

I imagine being one of the Mago brothers is akin to roasting marshmallows on a summer night after watching the Baby Sitters Club movie where Larisa Oleynik isn’t playing Alex Mack or being secretive about it. The night would start out that way until someone called Zeus and told him Al Roker stole his lightning bolts as a goof. Then the real fun would begin. That’s just my take on their lifeI guess. I myself know what it’s like having brothers. I don’t feel Sam’s pain of being the youngest as I am the oldest and most responsible* of the Miller boys.

Augustana got to know the older Mago brothers, but missed out on Migz Magz. Sam it’s been fantastic getting to know you, I can only hope we can go on more TGI Fridays and Red Lobster dates in the future.


Call me.

Also tell your parents Sue and Michael G., “Hello, is it me you’re looking for?”. They will tell me I had them before hello, I know this will happen.


1. What do you study at Augustana?

SM: “Political Science, Business with a Finance Concentration, and hopefully economics as well in the future. I am also part of a research team here on campus that studies the rare breed of homo sapien the “Frank Kalble”. Findings are not yet conclusive, but the research has been very exciting and reckless.”


2. What is your favorite thing about football?

SM: “Eating the pigskin.”

3. Rob, you, Johnny, and Migz are all chosen to go through a wardrobe and save Narnia. Which one of you is most likely to succumb to Turkish Delight and join the White Queen (played by Jimmy Stewart) for a short time before coming to his senses and becoming a hero again?
SM: “Usually it would be Johnny succumbing to evil, but now that you mention Jimmy Stewart, it’s definitely Rob who would fall into the shadows. I don’t know if he would come back to his senses or if we would want him back, however.”
4. What’s the most American thing you could ever do?
SM: “Make a time machine, go back to 1941 and personally destroy the axis of evil by using the technology of the Slap-Chop. I’m still working on this process, so if you know anyone with a Slap-Chop, please contact me, it’s the final piece of the puzzle.”
5. What was your favorite action figure growing up?
SM: “He-Man (The Woman Hater Edition)”
6. What do you want out of life?
SM: “All that I’m after is a life full of laughter as long as I’m laughing with Ernest P. Worrell.”
7. What late night news personality would you trust most to do your homework correctly?
SM: “Jay Leno’s Chin”
8. Out of you, Johnny, and Rob, who gets the coolest Christmas presents and who gets a lump of coal?
SM: “I get the best gifts, including my favorite from 2003 a life-size Hulk Hogan doll. Robby gets coal, and then Johnny eats the coal.”
9. What’s the coolest thing that the ghost of Ronald Reagan could do here at Augustana?
SM: “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down President Bahls.” (I see what you did there!)
10. Magnets, how do they work?
SM: “I asked myself this question once when I was with Shaggy 2 Dope down at Friscoe Bay while I was trying to feed a fish to a pelican. The bird subsequently tried to eat my cell phone, I ran away. Are you a believer in miracles?”
All I do is believe friend.

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