A window inside life at Augustana College

Augustana People: Bo Goshorn, A Life of Being Awesome

At Augustana I have met quite a great many of fantastic people, I intend to write about them with their permission. Bo Goshorn was being massive one day and I said, “what is a good subject to write about?”

Bo said, “the plight of the American school system”


I have amazing ears.

Bo is a loyal friend and will stick up for his friends when the time is needed. One time when I was being mugged by a lady who loves cats my friend Bo came by and flexed away her kittens knowing I was allergic to cats. From this point on we became Facebook friends. We play football together which means we can both release the fury when the time is right. A five year old once described him as the fastest number 31 on the Augustana Football team! Bo hails from Romeoville, Illinois and is a graduate of Romeoville high school where he invented the use of punctuation in text messages. Currently in his Sophomore year this man has lived a life full of Augustana adventure. When I called up Vin Diesel about his opinion of this young man he simply stated, “how did you get this number”. I knew right then and there that what we had was a special human being who doesn’t have blood coursing through his veins but he does have a billion miniature bear-sharktopus’ running through them. Bo has remarked to me that this is how he gains his edge over his opponents.

“Run run as fast as you can, I ate a gingerbread cookie” -Thomas Edison 


Bo has many friends on campus and some even like to take care of his cleaning duties.

A pre-Robocop Rob Mago digging for gold in the Goshorn caverns

Bo is an involved Augustana student who always has a good time and gets his work done. I am honored to call him a friend and fellow Jenny Lind/Jeremy Lin 1st floor citizen. If you are considering coming to Augie, say hello to him and give him a hug.

Then the wild Rumpus will begin


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